I Am Back

Yes it has been a long time since I last posted.  Most of you I know are having withdrawls.  Some have slunk into mild depression.  A couple of you are rocking in the corner.  However, the sun has come out and I am back.  Part of my long absence was a lack of anything interesting to blog about.  Partly, I was gone for 2 weeks to visit my motherland.  But what about post New Years?  I have been on the couch, suffering as no one should suffer with a horrible, nasty, miserable cold.  As I endured, I learned some things that I would like to share.

1.  The human body produces 1 liter of mucus per day.  Mine produces 3.
2.  Vaporizers are somewhat traumatizing.  They resemble monster faces, glow in the night, and creepy-breathe at me like a phone stalker.
3.  Luis and I can last at least a week on food storage.
4.  I can last a week on popsicles and jello.
5.  Luis eats cactus and egg with ketchup.
6.  I can sleep propped upon 3 pillows.
7.  I get strange looks when pulling out a roll of toilet paper from my purse to blow my nose.
8.  Luis is a very effective soother.  He strokes my hair and reads his research behind why snow is white.  (Now I feel better!)
9.  The only time I like milk on my cereal is when I'm sick.
10.  I need some training on how to brush my teeth when my nose is plugged up.

What Luis Wants for Christmas

Luis has a very one track mind.  I asked him what he wants for Christmas, but mostly he just copied my list.  (No Luis, I am NOT buying you a princess wand for Christmas.)  I don't need a list though.  I know what he really wants.  He wants the thing he thinks about non-stop.  The thing he asks for at least once a week.  The thing for which he makes me walk miles and miles.

A Krispy Kreme Donut.

How do I know he wants this?

First of all, I confiscated his Santa letter.

Secondly, I was tending for our friends so they could find out the gender of their baby.  When I came home, I said, "Hey Lu, guess what the Mohlmans are having."  His eyes lit up and he said, "Krispy Kreme?"  No Lu... a baby boy.

The final donut incident occurred at our ward Christmas breakfast.  People were lined up to get their food, so we decided to wait until the line died down a bit.  That was until he spied a box of Krispy Kreme at the food table.  What did he do?  He skipped the line, walked right over to the box, and grabbed himself a donut. 

So, unbeknownst to him, I am plotting for Santa to bring him his favorite treat Christmas morning.  (Don't you dare tell him!)  And the thing is, if I succeed in surprising him, this will most likely be his most memorable Christmas gift of all time.  Years from now, his grand kids will be sitting on his lap asking, "Grandpa, what was your favorite Christmas gift?"  And he'll say, "You know, there was this one time Santa brought me some donuts.  That was pretty swell."

And to close, I would just like to point out that unfortunately, I don't think Luis will ever be asked to play Santa at ward Christmas parties.  "Mama, why is Santa brown?"

Opening Early - Cha Ching!

Luis and I have been blessed with some great friends here in California.  We especially love that the Mohlman family lives here in our apartment complex.  Being able to walk over and spend hours at their house has been fabulous for me and has helped with the lonely issue when Luis is off at school. 

About a week ago, we exchanged Christmas gifts, but despite my pleas, we DID NOT open them.  However, I knew it wouldn't be long before Brandi, BJ, and Luis would become desperate to open the gifts early.  Sure enough, on Sunday, the Mohlmans convinced us to make them Oreo cookies, come over to their house, and open gifts together.  (You would think our gift would be enough, but NO...they had the gall to ask for cookies too!  Can you believe some people?)

After slaving away for hours, we finished the cookies and headed over.  We got to open ours first. Brandi had asked for an assortment of pictures from us and with them, made mini calendar cards through a site called Shabby Princess.   Then, we can use a CD case to prop them up and display them through the year.  They are really adorable!

For the Mohlmans, I used Shutterfly to create a book of their son, Bennett.  It was really fun to do.  I love Shutterfly!

We decided next year, it would be our husbands' turn to make the gifts.  Yeah right.

Later that night, we decided to play some games.  We admitted that when we helped the Mohlmans move into their apartment, we caught a glimpse of their Wii games, which motivated us to become friends with them:)  Although Guitar Hero and Mario cart MAY not be ideal Sabbath Day activities, we had a good time.

(By they way Mohlmans, I just consulted with spell check and your last name is wrong.  Which would you prefer?  Milkmans, Mailmans, or Oilmans.)

D -ECO- RATIONS

Hello Friends,

Although I felt like putting up my decorations the 2nd week of November, I refrained until the week 3.  Since we'll be in Utah during Christmas (hoot hoot), I wanted some time to enjoy the holiday glamour.  I picked a Saturday when Luis had to study so I could fill up my time with fun fun fun!  Since my mommy gave me her hand-me-down tree, we were able to put one up.  Unfortunately, the tree is a bit "special" looking.  No wonder she handed it down.  We call it our Charlie Brown tree.  There are a total of 13 ornaments.  We have no tree topper.  We have no tree skirt.  And my favorite part is how realistic the inner-pole makes our tree look.

I was sent the new ornaments my sisters and mom made, but then 1/3 of our lights went out. No matter how much I twist the bulbs, nothing happens.  Poor pathetic tree.

In true hoarding fashion, I've been collecting decorations through the years even though "I still lived with my mom."  (Some of you know that story.  The rest of you I'll leave to wondering.)  After this post hits the web, I'm looking forward to hearing from Better Homes & Garden.  My undiscovered decorating skills are pretty much through the roof.  Just look at those groupings!

Oh yeah, and I also bought this adorable Nativity Set for our household of kids to play with.  Luis did happen to point out that Joseph is holding a staff, when in fact he is a carpenter.  And there's no shepherd.

When Luis saw all the decorations up in November, he started singing that Anastasia hit "In a Sweet November."  You mean "Once Upon a December," Lu?  Oh yeah. 

It's okay, you can laugh at him too.

And now I would like to end with an issue Luis and I have been debating.  Which requires more energy usage: one strand of Christmas lights or one light bulb?  Feedback on this important issue would be great, although I'll probably be googling it as soon as I've posted.

merry Christmas!

Thanksgiving

Naturally, I've been planning our Thanksgiving meal since before Halloween.  This was my very first shot at creating my first Thanksgiving meal.  Now that I have tackled THAT turkey, I would like to share a startling discovery.  For some evil, dark, reason, companies tied to Thanksgiving wanted me to fail.

It began with the turkey, which the entire meal is centered around.  Without warning, a gizzard bag was stuffed up the turkey where it is hidden from view, hoping that some unsuspecting newbie like myself will NOT know of its existence, NOT take out the bag, and NOT end up with an edible turkey.

Then, there was the gravy.  Yes, I could have purchased nasty gravy packets, but on Thanksgiving, that's just wrong.  For a truly groovy gravy, one must make it from scratch.  And do you suppose there are recipes for said gravy.  Of course.  Start with 3 heaping spoonfuls (how heaping?), add water until thickened but not gloopy (how thickened?), pour in strained turkey juices (I don't have a strainer.), and don't forget the KEY ingredient: potato water...but not too much (I added too much).

Of course, what about the timing of everything?  In order for everything to be hot and ready at precisely the right time, I should have secured 3 ovens and 7 arms.

The pies?  Unless you're an expert (which I'm not), you will not know to puncture the crust with a fork to prevent the crust from sinking.  And do the recipes tell you this?  Of course not.

Thankfully, after only 10 minutes of crying over my ruined gravy, dry turkey, and cold potatoes, Luis was able to calm me down and we had a very nice Thanksgiving meal (after warming everything up in the microwave). 

Beautiful, wonderful, Black Friday ads.

My helper who stayed home from a football game to be with his clingy wife.

Luis spending time with his family.

My fabulously, buttery rolls.

An example of our place settings.

Our feast.



I would like to dedicate this holiday to the many people who gave us platters and bowls for our wedding, my mother who assisted me via cell phone, my husband who probably should've chosen a stronger woman, the Mohlmans who lent us their gravy boat, Chevron the carrier of LA Times with Black Friday ads, Winco for selling me our turkey for $3.00, Dawn Dish Soap for containing biodegradable surfactants whilst cleaning our dishes, Martha Stewart and Studio 5 for inspirational tips, and pumpkins everywhere.

Laptop Revival

Out of the blue, Luis gets this sheepish look in his eyes and says to me, "Ashley, you're wonderful.  I love so much."  Not that I don't love that, but I knew something was up.  We can't mask things very well at our home.  He then tells me a little story about my laptop that I have so generously allowed him to take to school every day.  One morning, he was at school using his computer when he realized he had to book-it to class.  He flipped the lid shut, grabbed his gear, and headed off...clueless to the fact that he had done something very wrong.  Can you guess?  Once he arrived at said destination, he took out his laptop, pried it open, and "Oh no."  He had accidentally left his pen cap on the keyboard when he shut the lid, which resulted in a cracking of the screen pigments...or whatever (the screen broke).  Apparently, Lu was worried about the reaction of his occasionally emotionally unstable woman.  Well, I'm proud to say, that I reacted very sweetly and calmly (right after I threw a chair out the window - he he he). 

Instead of deciding to buy a new laptop, he chose to get it fixed.  However, after talking to a Best Buy associate, and finding out they would charge $300, he opted to do the fixing himself.  Since he is the wrong kind of nerd (science, not electronics), he began by watching some online tutorials.  He then purchased a new screen, a few tools, and we went to work.

As you can see, I was his assistant.  So of course, the outcome was successful!  We're pretty much experts at laptop screen transplants now, so if you ever leave a pen cap on the keyboard, shut the lid, and crack the pigments...give us a call!

Rainbow Brites

A few months ago we received notice that our entire complex was going to be painted.  We got a sneak peek of possible color options when they tried out some of the possibilities on one of our neighboring buildings.  I was really excited for the new look.  That was until I saw the paint color winners.  Here are two shots of the BEFORE look.

 And here are the AFTER shots.  I really hated these new colors.  Every time we walked by Luis got to hear me murmur, "ugly ugly ugly!"  It was one of my main topics of choice whenever I saw a friend from the complex.  "Don't you just HATE the new paint?"  I must say though, I am getting used to the new look.

And this is my black door.

Speaking of paint, here's a paint job I don't think I've blogged about yet.  It's very possible I have posted this, but since I can't remember and am too lazy to check, I thought I'd just throw it in here.  When Luis and I got married, we needed a table.  Since none of my siblings would "hand-me-down" their tables (which I thought was quite selfish of them), I had to buy my own.  So, mom, Luis, and I began to frequent DI.  Fabulously, we happened upon a pretty junky-looking table which we were able to FIX UP with paint.  One move later, it looked like this.

Since we brought the paint with us to California, I decided to fix it up so it wasn't so disgraceful.  Isn't she pretty now?  The bad news is that the finish we put on it isn't great.  Some of the paint has already peeled off again.  Drat!



(By the way, if you're wondering what my title has to do with this post, you're not alone.  I myself am quite confused.)